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How Do I Sit In Meditation And Watch My Breath

Craig Daniels ·Leave a Comment

Introduction – Watch My Breath

Often those new to mindfulness practice find themselves a bit confused upon receiving the instruction to watch your breath. Frequently I’ve heard people exclaim, “Watch My Breath?” And then rather sheepishly add a follow up, “How?” How indeed.

Is watching your breath an act of concentration, attention, focus or is it something else altogether? The simple answer is that it’s none of those and yet it’s all of those. An example might help. Walking in a field one summer I looked up into the sky to see the most beautiful clouds I’d ever seen and immediately I became part of the scene. There were no words in my mind yet I knew and felt the beauty clearly. I was aware of being in those moments without thought, judgement or any need to capture any of it. Watching your breath is the same thing, you’re aware of it and even focused on it, but it’s not exertion or willpower holding your attention. Does that make any sense? If not, try letting it marinate a while.

Watch My Breath, awareness within a moment, without thinking. As Suzuki Roshi would say “nothing special.”

Mindfulness practice may seem like it’s mostly about the command  “Watch My Breath” without falling asleep, but the practice also continues once you get out of your chair or once you standup from your sitting cushion.

The time after watching your breath becomes the time to watch each moment without exertion. You’ll notice space unfolding within each moment, maybe for the first time. The present moment is not only all around you, but it’s where each of us exists in time. Whether we are washing dishes, reading a book, listening to a friend share a story or merely sitting on the back steps watching the grass grow, The present moment unfolds into the next present moment.

“Watch My Breath” (WMB) is the key that unlocks our awareness of the present moment. WMB opens a glorious panorama of each moment as it merges into the next moment into the next moment into the next moment. WMB allows us to see, feel and know the richness of each moment (without thought) and to be inoculated from the constant distractions arising from the noisy world around us.

WMB gives us place, within the present moment. To be.

I created a short story (below) about how Alice searches for the how to best watch her breath. We all search differently, right?

For reasons only known to Alice, she sets out on a journey to find the perfect chair for meditating, a comfortable chair while at the same time a chair to give her lots of support for extended sittings. Alice wants a chair that will keep her from slouching and falling asleep, and so she embarks on her quest at a local bus stop in hope of finding the perfect chair that is “just right”.

Enjoy the story. In a rush?  Scroll down the page where you’ll find an infographic with 7 Tips for Sitting in Meditation.

The Journey

A dilapidated city bus rolls into its destination emitting a squeak as it’s tires scrape against the granite curb and stops. The driver turns the ignition off, and the exhaust puffs with relief. Behind the dusty split windows a few passengers turn to stare blankly out toward an equally dilapidated bus stop and if they care to look further they’d also notice a curiously situated storefront, it’s crooked sign lazily dangling in the soft breeze spelling out, Local Haberdashery.

No one on the bus wears a hat, not even the ancient bus driver. Very Curious.

Alice, our heroine patiently waits on the edge of the same granite curb. She teeters slightly backwards as the bus pulls up but doesn’t flinch from its closeness, nor from its rather pedestrian squeak.

The buses rusted framed doors swing inwards with a whoosh as they open, and Alice steps into the buses dark opening, where she climbs the four steps of the bus. On the landing Alice stops and turns to watch the doors squeak shut, she smiles at the empty bus stop which waits silently for the next scheduled bus to arrive.

The bus driver turns the ignition on and slowly spins the enormous steering wheel to the left while deftly pressing the accelerator, the bus lumbers forward into the traffic stream.  

Alice, who’s still standing on the landing next to the driver quickly surveys the scene noting to herself all the empty seats available. And once sure of her bearings she asks the driver, “Would you know where I might purchase a chair, a chair that is just right, so I can sit down and Watch My Breath?” The driver smiles while gazing into the big mirror above Alice’s head that reflects all the passengers on the bus, sitting quietly. “I know three places” he says, “one of which I’m sure will be just right,” he pauses and then poses his own question. “But, are you sure you’re getting onto the right story?” He asks hesitantly.  Alice smiles and says, “Oh yes fine sir, I assure you I know just where I am.”

“You can get help from teachers,
but you are going to have to learn a lot by yourself,
sitting alone, in a room.”
Dr. Seuss

The bus rumbles and grumbles as it inches forward toward its many destinations, passing by bookstores, tea-shops and a whole sundry of interesting establishments. Alice moves deeper into the grungy bus, each hand giving her balance as they by slide upon the chrome bar hanging from the ceiling. Going deeper into the bus reminds her of something she may have read in a book, or maybe it was a dream, but she can’t for the life of her remember for sure. She sits on an empty seat moving a little left and than right till it’s just right. Once settled Alice watches the establishments and people outside the bus drift by without as much as a thought bouncing in or out of her head.

After a myriad of stops along it’s route the bus pulls over next to a big box store with huge red letters proclaiming Everything Office. The bus driver turns noisily on his vinyl seat and shouts at Alice, “hey, looking for a chair? This is your stop.” Startled a bit by his gruffness Alice waves and exits from the buses side door. Once on firm ground she quickly turns back toward the bus waving again while softly mouthing “thank you.”

Before entering the store Alice peers through it’s tinted windows, “I wonder if this is the place?” she muse’s, before going inside, “I hope they have a chair that is just right for me.,” she says softly, to no one in particular. The door closes behind her.

Before she can take three steps into the store a rather short and cute young Bear greets Alice. “Welcome,” says the bear. “Oh!” Alice exclaims as she takes one step backwards.”You’re a Bear!”  “Indeed I am” the bear replies.

Looking directly into the eyes of the young bear Alice says,  “I mean no offense but I didn’t expect to find a bear when I walked in.” “No offense taken,” the bear says, and he continues, “I didn’t expect for you to walk into this story either.” Alice ponders the bear for a moment and reply’s with a wink, “I assure you I am just where I’m supposed to be.” .

The sales-bear proceeds to show Alice the only chair he carries in stock. “I consider this overstuffed chair to be nearly a perfect chair.” the bear says. And he continues his pitch, “It will quickly take you to dreamland, leaving you refreshed and energized ready to accomplish great things” When the bear finishes Alice puts her fingers to her mouth and utters a stifled “oh!”

overstuffed chair

“The chair is wonderful” says Alice, “but falling asleep will just not do, I believe I need to look elsewhere. “I understand,” says the bear, “I wish you all the best,” and with that the bear ushers Alice through the door and back out into the busy world.

Once outside Alice stops, and for a moment thinks to herself “that was a rather rude exit” but being Alice she turns back toward the store with a big smile and waves.

“I love going to coffee shops
and just sitting and listening.”
Julia Roberts

Alice walks toward the bus stop and as she gets close she notices the bus is waiting with it’s door open, and it’s engine running. She peers inside the door and the driver says “ready for the next stop?”

Once again in the bus Alice looks around to get her bearings, and she notices 3 rather boisterous pigs sitting all the way in the back of the bus. The 3 pigs notice Alice and they wave and each one blows rather loud party horns.

Alice turns to the bus driver and asks “who are they?” “they’re regulars” the driver says, and then adds “they heard you were in this story and wanted to see for themselves.”

Putting her hands on her hips Alice thinks to herself “Bears, pigs and overstuffed chairs such a curious reality I live in.”

Before Alice can get comfortable the bus abruptly comes to a stop and the doors open. “This is your next stop, I believe” says the driver.

Alice quickly stands, waves goodbye to the pigs and climbs down the buses stairs to the sidewalk. And being Alice, she turns and waves to the driver, mouthing “thank you.”

Alice stares up at yet another big box store and reads to herself the sign. Green Tea Emporium and 2nd Hand Furniture. “My,” she thinks “ what a curious name for a business.”

the dialogue six
sitting meditation infographic

[sc name=”7 sitting tips”]

Watch My Breath (Continued)

Alice walked across a nearly empty parking lot carefully not stepping on one of the many cracks in the weathered surfaced black top. “Curious” she thought to herself upon realizing she was acting on a long ago learned superstition. “Don’t step on a crack or you’ll break your mothers back” she said aloud. ” I wonder where all these thoughts come from,” she pondered and then deliberately stepped on every crack remaining in her path.

Alice stood at the stores entrance framed in bright flowers with a huge welcome sign hanging askew on the door. She reached up, pulled the door’s handle and let herself into a cavernous space. The first thing she noticed was the overwhelming smell of flowers, it was as if she’s stumbled into a florist shop and not a second hand furniture and tea shop.

“My how sweet and welcome I feel, ” Alice said. “That’s the goal” said the Bear standing next to Alice. Anxiously, Alice stepped back 2 or 3 steps, “why I hadn’t noticed you, standing there” said Alice between deep breaths. “If I may, Are you related to the Bear in the Everything Office?” asked Alice in a timid voice. “I am indeed” answered the Bear while extending a tray full of fresh baked cookies she’d had been holding, adding, “He’s my son.”

Seeing the cookies Alice realized how very hungry she felt, and seemingly reading her thoughts the Bear said, “please take as many as you’d like, you must be very hungry from traipsing around in a new story?” Alice gratefully took 3 cookies from the tray. “Thank you,” she said.

“Sometimes you need to sit lonely
on the floor in a quiet room
in order to hear your own voice and
not let it drown in the noise of others.”
Charlotte Eriksson

Once she’d eaten her fill of the delicious cookies Alice asked the Bear, “please can you help me find the right chair so I might sit and watch my breath?” “I have what may be the most perfect chair already picked out for you,” replied the Bear.

The Bear walked over to a golf cart and said, “please Alice won’t you join me for a quick ride to the chair department?” “Wow,” thought Alice, “a chair dept, surely I’ll find just what I’m looking for there.”  “I’m sure you will,” said the bear as she shifted the cart into gear, and they sped away down the long long aisle into the hugely cavernous space.

Where Am I?

The ride to the chair dept seemed very long to Alice and little by little she allowed her eyes to close. She nodded off, for how long she did not know. But finally the cart stopped with a jerk and Alice woke up. “Where am I,” she thought to herself. “You’re in the chair dept of course,” said the Bear. Alice blinked repeatedly as she looked around the empty space surrounding her, why she couldn’t see any walls or ceiling but she knew she was in a room.

“There’s the chair,” said the Bear. Alice looked and looked and finally she made out what looked like a huge egg maybe 50 yards from where she sat. “It’s an egg,” exclaimed Alice. “Yes indeed, ” said the Bear. “I call it The Cosmic Egg Chair, “” It will help you crack open your awareness while meditating.” Said the Bear. “Crack open my awareness, oh my!, may I sit in it?” proffered Alice, her arms open wide. “Go right ahead,” said the Bear.

cosmic egg chair

Alice walk by herself toward the cosmic egg chair deliberately. Once she reached the chair she walked around it a few times running her fingers over its smooth fiberglass surface, and climbed inside. “It’s much more comfortable than I had envisioned,” she thought to herself. “I’ll close my eyes and try it out, though I do hope nothing cracks open.”

For nearly 20 minutes Alice sat in the cosmic egg watching her breath, but she was not able to sit still. Alice watched as she breathed in and watched as she breathed out, she even watched the little pause at the end of her out breath, but she could not stop fidgeting. Finally Alice opened her eyes and clumsily climbed out of the egg chair all the while carrying a big frown on her face.

The Bear watched Alice follow the path of watch my breath for the whole time and yet not even her good wishes had any effect on Alice. The Bear knew the cosmic egg chair was not the right chair for Alice and her heart sank.

I’m sorry,” said Alice, “But this chair just won’t do, it’s not the right chair for me to sit on and watch my breath, oh what shall I do?” The Bear gave poor Alice a big bear-hug and gently led her to the stores exit. “Try the next store and you may find the chair that is just right,” said the Bear.

Without saying anything Alice walked slowly through the exit door and toward the bus stop, but being Alice she turned back, smiled as she waved and mouthed “Thank You” to the Bear in the Tea and Furniture Store.

The Search Continues

Though a bit slumped over and tired Alice proceed to walk toward the bus stop once more. A few yards from the bus stop Alice stopped, and asked herself, “what am I doing running around to find the perfect chair?” There was no answer either in her head nor from the the small crowd of onlookers who were watching this story with keen interest. Alice sighed and set off on foot to the next store.

Alice noticed as she walked that if she picked up her pace she could lose even the story onlookers and be alone for the first time on this journey. She really did appreciate all the advice and encouragement she’d received so far from the onlookers as well as the bus driver and the bears but she needed space to find her chair by herself.

“If I want to Watch My Breath and sit in meditation I need to stop all this wrestling and grasping with thoughts about what is and what isn’t the right chair, why maybe I don’t even a chair at all” she thought hurriedly. This last bit of thinking caused Alice to stop walking altogether, she took a deep breath. “Maybe any old chair will do,” she said aloud, and this thought spurred her quickly on toward the next store. The onlookers, who now had caught up with Alice noticed she walked with a sprightly spring in her step and everyone mimicked her newly found spring and moved forward.

What Was It You Wanted ?

Alice walked a short while to reach the 3rd store the bus driver had told her about. What she saw as she turned the corner was a huge expanse of cracked concrete with yellowed grasses inhabiting the cracks of a deserted mall parking lot. In the center of the wasteland sat a small vendors cart with a red and yellow striped awning protecting it from the sun. And sitting in a lawn chair next to the brightly colored cart was a huge brown Bear.

Staying in character, Alice found all this very curious and more than a bit surreal. For a moment she teetered upon the granite curbing surrounding the wasteland, her hesitation achingly passed and she continued her journey forward. The loyal onlookers decided to venture no further and setup a small waiting area they named Highway 61  where they could sit and watch the final act.

A few steps before reaching the cart Alice noticed a weathered sign dangling crookedly from the vendors cart, it read Chop Wood, Carry Water, she smiled and spoke out-loud for the first time since leaving the last store, ” it’s missing the After Enlightenment part.” “Are you quite sure of that?” said the Bear in a very deep and booming voice. “Maybe it’s missing “Before Enlightenment.” he continued and quickly before Alice could speak again he added, ” are you enlightened, Alice?”

The questions was so unexpected, Alice could feel her face turn red  and Alice couldn’t identify the other feelings. Alice replied boldly “I most certainly am not,” and at that statement everything came back into focus. At that moment she noticed a rather large rusted animatronic likeness of Willy Nelson standing quietly next to the Bear’s chair. The Bear nodded in her direction while raising his arm toward the animtronic man and dropped a coin into a slot in its chest and with rusty squeeks it began to sing a gravely version of Dylan’s 1989 tune, What Was It You Wanted

Written by: Bob Dylan

 1. What was it you wanted
Tell me again so I’ll know
What’s happening in there
What’s going on in your show
What was it you wanted
Could you say it again
I’ll be back in a minute
You can get it together by then
 
2. What was it you wanted
You can tell me I’m back
We can start it all over
Get it back on the track
You got my attention
Go ahead speak
What was it you wanted
When you were kissing my cheek
 
3. Was there somebody looking
When you gave me that kiss
Someone there in the shadows
Someone that I might have missed
Is there something you needed
Something I don’t understand
What was it you wanted
Do I have it in my hand
 
4. Whatever you wanted
Slipped out of my mind
Would you remind me again
If you’d be so kind
Has the record been breaking
Did the needle just skip
Is there somebody waiting
was there a slip of lip
 
5. What was it you wanted
I ain’t keepin’ score
Are you the same person
That was here before
Is it something important
Maybe not
What was it you wanted
Tell me again I forgot
 
6. Whatever you wanted
What could it be
Did somebody tell you
That you could get it from me
Is it something that comes natural
Is it easy to say
Why do you want it
Who are you anyway
 
7. Is the scenery changing
Am I getting it wrong
Is the whole thing going backwards
Are they playing our song
Where were you when it started
Do you want it for free
What was it you wanted
Are you talking to me
Copyright © 1989 by Special Rider Music
 
Alice stood transfixed as the metal Willy Nelson sang the haunting tune, she had no thoughts and nothing to say. When the performance was over the Bear once again lifted his arm and pointed to a chair atop the vendor cart which much like the animatronic man she had not noticed till it was pointed out to her. Alice walked over to the cart and touched the rather plain brown wooden chair and placed it on the ground next to the Bear. “Take the chair” the Bear said gruffly. “Oh thank you very much,” said Alice and she picked up the chair and walked away.  She did however turn back at the edge of the grass for a moment, and waved to the Bear and being Alice she mouthed “Thank You.”
 
“A simple brown wooden chair I can sit in and watch my breath.” thought Alice. It was what she had been looking for all a long. It was “just right,” she said out loud as she walked back to the bus stop with her chair. Once on the bus the drive asked ” how what your journey?” Alice replied with a smile, “very curious, very curious indeed.” And with that she walked to her seat and looked out the window for the first time.

 

 

simple chair
 
 

***NOTE*** Prior to the advent of Social Media and Smart Phones it was not uncommon for stories to be populated with guests from other stories that just dropped in to see what was going on in a new story. In this story the 3 Pigs were very curious to see what Alice was up to so they came and went a few times to keep track of her adventures. And onlookers or fans also would frequently show up in stories to watch things play out. Occasionally the onlookers would give advice or ask questions of the stories main characters, but for the most part they kept a respectful distance and stayed very quiet, much like the crowds of yesteryear did at golf tournaments. All very different from today’s loud and intrusive social media fans.  But, we all know that everything changes. Right?

7 Meditation Sitting Tips from Craig Daniels
This Slideshow is a short view of the 7 sitting tips from the above infographic.

Be Aware Of Your Thoughts

Craig Daniels ·Leave a Comment

be aware of your thoughts
Be Aware of Your Thoughts

Be careful how you are talking to yourself, because you are listening.

Lisa M Hayes

A new study recently published in Nature Communications from a team at Queens University suggests that we have 6200 thoughts each day. And while this is a radically different number than those of the past which had pegged the number at 60,000 thoughts each day, each of us thinks a huge amount of the time. And few of us are aware of what we are thinking about. Few of us are aware of how much time we spend in the past or in the future.

Few of us are aware that the vast majority of our thoughts are negative and judgemental.

Often I find myself deeply in conversation with myself. I become aware I’ve constructed a conversation built upon layers of how I’d like things to be and not how they really are. I become aware of my attempt to rewrite the past or control the narrative in the future.

Can you relate to the above scenario? Do you see similarities in your own internal dialogue with rewriting the past to make it more favorable to yourself, or coloring the view of the future with rosy shades of winning?

Think about being in conversation with yourself for a moment.

I wonder, how many conversations do we have with ourselves each day? And though these conversations are occurring in our mind how strangely unaware we are of what’s being discussed.

This unawareness is not limited only to internal dialogue, but at times includes daily mundane routines such as walking down a flight of stairs. Often while engaged in one of these routines I become aware of two things. The first is that I’m actively engaged in conversation in my head and secondly, I don’t fully remember walking down the flight of stairs.

Of course I have a faint memory of the descent down the stairs, but most of my energy was directed to the conversation, meaning my awareness was not in the moment, my present moment awareness was absent. And surprise, my awareness was not in the conversation either. My mind was lingering in the past or quite possibly grasping toward the future, but I wasn’t paying attention to the content. I wasn’t working through options to solve a problem.

When I say conversation in my mind I’m not referring to the thinking we all do when we are working through a logistic problem at work, or trying to decided which school is best for our children. What I’m referring to is the mindless (automatic) conversations we all have throughout each day. Conversations that have a life of their own, and generally these streams of thoughts are judgmental or fantasizing in nature. It’s when you are listening that the amount of thoughts being produced becomes clear, and at times somewhat disturbing.

Whatever you focus your attention on will become important to you even if it’s unimportant

Sonya Parker

Examples of mindless thinking may include telling someone how to live their life, explaining to a friend why another friend is wrong or a myriad of subjects being created non-stop within our mind. It’s these conversations we need to become aware of if we hope to fully integrate with mindfulness and the present moment. If we want to embrace the power of dialogue you need to be aware of your thoughts.

Take a short break (10-15 minutes) a few times each day and listen to your thoughts. Be aware while you listen to the continuous stream of thoughts randomly bouncing around  or maybe forming conversations in your head. Ask yourself, am I these thoughts I’m listening to? And also ask yourself if you are the one who is aware of your thinking. These short (10-15 minute) breaks can also be used for more directed mindfulness practice, such as watching your breath

It’s not even necessary in the beginning that you answer these questions. What’s important is to ask them each time you sit to watch and listen to your thoughts. The questions are only a device to help sweep away some pretty thick cobwebs. It’s the questions themselves that sharpens our awareness of these floating thought streams. The questions are like your windshield wipers on your car, and each time you focus your attention by asking a question you pull open the curtain in your mind.

Trust me I know this little exercise and the questions I’ve asked you to think about may seem way out in left field if you’re new to this. But if we have any hope of slowing down or even stopping the internal dialogue crashing around within our skull it’s important that we grow our self awareness. Our mind is populated with bias, assumptions, judgments and a myriad of mazes and tunnels we are not even aware that we’ve created.

Once you settle into sitting and listening to your thoughts try adding paying attention to the space that forms between your collection of thoughts. This space will appear as one thought fades and before the next one takes center stage. When you can let your focus rest within these thought spaces the size of the spaces will grow as will your silent awareness of current reality.

Throughout each day our minds generate thousands and thousands of mostly random thoughts. Current estimates of 40,000 to 60,000 thoughts appear in our mind each day. Most of these seemingly random thoughts escape our notice, they pop into our mind and pop out only to repeat themselves over and over and over each day. We want to become aware of these thoughts, become aware so we can move beyond random thinking.

Whoops! I looked up as I was clicking on publish to realize I was caught in a swirl of thoughts having nothing to do with what I’m trying to convey here. I forgot to include what may be the most important tip about how you are listening.

“Awareness is the greatest agent for change.”

Eckhart Tolle

When you take a break from your busy day to learn more about how you are thinking, the first and most important thing to remember is to not be judgmental as you watch your thoughts. Your thoughts will pour in like a waterfall and our job is to watch but also to be aware of when our judgment side starts yapping loudly about how bad, negative, terrible or even how good your thoughts are. Your thoughts are simply your thoughts and are neither good nor bad, your thoughts are automatically being generated within your brain, you’re not sitting there plotting to do something horrible. However, If you’re worried please talk with someone who can listen and offer help such at the national mental health resource page.

The more you watch the more random you’ll see your thoughts are. As you go about your day and you notice thoughts remind yourself they are only thoughts, and gently go back to what you were doing. When I see myself trapped in thoughts I simply say to myself or at times out-loud “thinking” and return to what I was doing. At times I have to say “thinking” a few times in a row to break the spell the thoughts are casting on my imagination, but mostly I know I’m thinking… Nothing more.

Becoming aware of your thoughts by using the word thinking merely brings your attention to what’s going on inside your mind, this word usage is not a judgement as to the goodness or badness of any particular thought, Our random thoughts will be happy and sad, angry and calm, bright and dark, silly and serious, Our thoughts sometimes may be disturbing and violent, and then turn into joyful and loving. I’m pointing all this out to share with you how random our 60,000 daily thoughts are and to assure you we all think violent and loving thoughts each day, it’s the nature of our minds randomness.

“Thinking” is merely a tool to show each of us how to be aware of your thoughts.

Leave your judgements and assumptions outside in a heap, as you watch your thoughts. This exercise is not about labeling your thoughts as “thinking”, no the act of saying to yourself “thinking” is simply a tool to snap your awareness into focus. I may become aware of having a spirited argument with a friend and instead of attempting to stop or judge the conversation I say “thinking”. Once I acknowledge I’m thinking I turn my attention back to the present moment or at times I’ll imagine the thoughts as balloons that float away and silently pop. Poof, poof, and poof. All this happens in less than a second.

be aware you are listening

When we don’t paint our thoughts with the big brush of judgement we are waking up our awareness from its distractions. Another benefit to not adding judgement to the mix is we avoid stuffing our thoughts and emotions down deep into our mind.

Acknowledging our thoughts allows you to Be Aware Of Your Thinking, we add nothing to our thinking and nothing will be left.

Here’s An Example

Imagine yourself in the shower, out of nowhere you find yourself having a conversation with a coworker, a loved-one or someone you don’t even know on a street corner. Now imagine the conversation turns into a heated argument, but of course you rise to the occasion and with wit and sparkle you prevail. Your conversation partner changes their mind gleefully adopting your point of view.

Is this a familiar scene? Do you have conversations with others in your mind, or should I say do you debate and lecture others while you are in the shower, in the car, riding an elevator or maybe walking around the block. If you’re like most people you have over 60,000 thoughts a day and many long discussions with other people.

All those thoughts and conversations take place in your mind, not in the physical world. All your thoughts are confined to your mind. What if you called your best friend and started yelling at her for things she said in one of your conversations that occurred in your mind. What do you think she her reaction would be?

Be Aware Of Your Thoughts

It’s simple, all our thoughts streaming through our mind come and go without having much effect on us until we grasp them. It’s the grasping onto our thoughts that creates a cascading ride on our emotional roller coaster. Once we start to connect out thoughts with the glue of belief, we’ve attributed reality to them and we suffer.

Choosing to be aware of your thoughts takes away their power over your emotional well-being. this disconnecting from your thoughts allows you to more clearly see and understand current reality.

Heading Photo by Samuel Austin on Unsplash

Mindful Meditation Opens Doors In Life

Craig Daniels ·Leave a Comment

This Mindful Meditation we see and hear about nearly everyday in blog posts, scattered across social media and inking its way across print media is much simpler to understand and to do than you may think.

For a brief moment imagine standing on a platform waiting for a train or subway car, now expand your imagining so you see you’re also in the middle of a workday crowd rushing to get to their jobs and running errands for the day with everyone slightly jostling each other on the platform worried they’ll be late, for whatever it is they think the have to do. Ask yourself “What Am I Doing Right Now?“

If you are distracted by the noise and energy on the station platform then it’s likely you’ve lost your focus and your connection to being mindful. If on the other hand you are aware of all the hubbub around you yet you are clam and focused on the moment you are inhabiting it’s likely you are being mindful.

Of course my little example above is a bit simplistic but closer to being in the moment without losing your focus than you might think. Being mindful is as simple as being present in each moment within each moment within each moment. Getting to that place can seem complicated but I assure you it is no more complicated than breathing in and then breathing out.

It’s no more complicated than feeling your left foot hit the ground and lift itself into the air while feeling your right foot do the same in sync with the left foot, that’s being mindful. Left than right and repeat, you’re moving forward right?

Each of us is on a seemingly endless journey along a road with many hills and valleys in the form of hopes and fears, in the form of judgments and assumptions about ourselves and about everyone and everything we come in contact with. Through the practice of mindful meditation we will discover a space we can inhabit that is free of judgments and assumptions. We can reach this space through a simple practice of breathing in and breathing out.

Our society urges us to practice wishful thinking and endless talking, but in the end these two practices are empty distractions and won’t help us to inhabit each moment in our life with focus, awareness and gusto (passion, vitality, love) and a feeling of being awake.

The practice is as vital and current today as it was 2500 years ago and you don’t have to join anything, pay anything, be anything (other than yourself), go anywhere, worship anything or anybody. No, you only need to sit and breathe in and out on a regular basis.

” it’s nothing special, but it is something”
shunryu suzuki

getting started

Mindful Meditation is a an act that’s as simple as watching yourself breathe in and out, it’s that simple, that basic. As your breath comes in and flows out your mind and body become synchronized. As your breath comes in and goes out you start to notice the stream of thoughts flowing through your mind, a stream of activity you usually are too distracted by the everyday noise to recognize.

Each of us has in the neighborhood of 60,000 thoughts each day, most of which we are unaware of. Most of these thoughts have little to do with what we are engaged in at the moment.

Practicing meditation allows us to create space within our mind which helps us to see each moment in a clearer and calmer view. This space gives us a chance to pause before we react to what’s going on around us and make more choices that are not colored by quick judgements, unfounded assumptions and unfocused basis.

1. pick a quiet space

Choose a quiet space for your mindful meditation practice and if at all possible pick a space located far away from all the external distractions in your life. If you are new to meditation you’ll soon find that your mind has more than enough thoughts and distractions without exposing yourself to extra noise and hum from the world while you sit in meditation. Choose a space where you can detach from your everyday life with ease.

Once you’ve spent enough time and sessions in meditation that you think it’s something you’d like to continue on a regular basis, consider creating part of that space into a dedicated area that’s reserved for practice. Maybe hang a few serene and peaceful pictures on the wall along with a small table for any items like books or candles you find inspiring to your practice.

2. sit comfortably

Sitting in meditation should not be confused with torture. If your knees or back are hurting you more than likely will quit the practice. So why put yourself through excruciating pain? Sitting is a marathon not a sprint and sitting comfortably is important.

If you want to ache and pay penance for some sin you’ve committed I suggest you visit a monastery and sit for hours and hours and hours each day, that will do it.

For the rest of us I suggest trying different postures till you feel you’ve found what works for you. You can sit on a cushion, on a chair, walk or stand. Others do lengthened yoga exercise and meditate while they hold a position, good for them but not for most of us.

From time to time I sill sit on a cushion but mostly I sit in one of those ergonomic office chairs with the high back and headrest. I use a chair because it supports my back very well and that is one of the keys to meditation NEVER SLOUCH. I rest my hands palms down on my thighs or folded in my lap left hand on top of my right hand and my thumbs touching comfortably.

Many years ago when I sat in a Zen center one of the monks would gently touch my shoulder while pushing on my lower back to help me reposition my posture and stop slouching, but now when I’m sitting alone I find the chair keeps me very straight.

I gotta say, I miss having a monk remind me to not slouch. (note to self – work on that attachment)

3 start small

When you begin your meditation practices, start with small chunks of time. Those who I’ve talked with over the years tell me 5, 7 or 10 minutes are worthy chunks of time to begin with. I personally always add 2 minutes to every chunk of time I’m committing to, so my start times would be 7, 9 and 12 minutes.
Why do I add 2 minutes? I add the 2 minutes because I never know how focused I am till I actually sit down in meditation, the extra two minutes is meant to absorb fidgeting around on the chair or cushion. I’m sure you all know it can be difficult to sit still when you first sit. So I think of the extra 2 minutes as throw-away minutes and then I get the most out of the remaining time. Even after years of sitting I still add 2 minutes to each session and sit either 37 or 47 minutes and let all my restlessness play out in the first 2 minutes.

4. focus on your breathing

Take a few deep breaths once you’ve gotten comfortable at the beginning of your meditation practice, try inhaling threw you nose for a count of 3 and exhaling through your mouth. Do this 2 or 3 times to settle things.

Some people can feel the air coming into their nose easily while others have to use their imagination, I’m one of the latter. I don’t feel the air until it is in my nose and starting to flow down into my lungs. But I have no problem with feeling it exit right at the entrance to my nose. Find a spot where it comes in and a spot where it flows out and sit with it as it comes in and goes out, comes in and goes out, comes in and goes out.

At the beginning as you are developing your practice bring the rising and falling of your chest of abdomen into your awareness if this helps. After a while you’ll be able to bring your focus down to a smaller area.

3 to 4 times during each sitting I will follow my breath as it travels into the back of my throat and then I’ll imagine it flowing down the out side of my neck into my shoulders and then reverses itself. I use this exercise to prod my neck and shoulders into releasing any accumulated tension which in turn frees up my breathing a bit more.

Observing the breath gives you refuge when your thoughts pop into your awareness and allows you to let them pass with judging if they are good or bad, right or wrong, light or dark. When you notice you are thinking gently bring your awareness back to your breath.

5. yes you'll think

When sitting in meditation it doesn’t matter if you have evil thoughts or good thoughts, they are only thoughts to be regarded as “thinking.” Your thoughts are nether sinful nor virtuous, nether dark or light. You may think about punching someone in the face or maybe you’ll think about buying all the ice-cream from the local ice-cream truck and giving it away to all the kids and their parents in the nearby park.

Don’t be shocked by your thinking just label your thoughts as “thinking ” and come back to the breath.

If the thoughts become overwhelming or your emotions starting roaring remind yourself that you are neither your thoughts or your emotions. At the end of the day you get to decide if you’ll hook onto your thoughts and emotions or if you’ll bring your focus back to your breath and allow your thought and emotions to tire themselves out.

Uncomfortable thoughts and emotions are a great time to strengthen your practice by releasing the hold they have on you. It’s when we judge the thoughts and emotions as good or bad that we increase their power. return to your breath over and over and over, soon enough your thoughts and emotions will move on as if they were never there. Breathe in and breathe out.

6. practice each day

How regularly you practice mindful meditation over a long stretch is more important than how long you sit, at least early on in your practice it is. 10 (12) minutes each and every day for 30 days is recommended over just 1 hour of straight sitting once a week. The commitment of sitting yourself down each day goes a long way toward connecting you with the present moment, connecting you with here and now.

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